Open Mouth, Insert Foot!!

This is a shorter story than I normally post but I have realized that you miss many of the comical things that happen simply because I have always thought of this blog as a place to dump my country silliness, when in reality it could and SHOULD be used for all types of silliness!  So, here goes (drum roll, please?)  This short little story happened while I was at work ( I am a high school teacher, when not playing in the dirt at home!) and is a prime example of me putting my foot in my mouth and also a morality tale on how quickly stories get passed around & CHANGED in the process (like the old telephone game!)
 So, one day last week we had a terrible wind storm that knocked out our power.  This meant my fan couldn't run which in turn means that I couldn't sleep.  So being up since 2 am I decide to shower and dress at home (by candlelight) and go to work early with the idea that I would finish hair and makeup there.  So, that is what I did and feeling a bit self conscious about whether I look like my normal self  I walk into the schools office and one of the secretaries compliments my shoes.  The other secretary says, "ooh, ooh, let me see"  As I am showing off my newest pair of high heels (I DO LOVE shoes) I say, "Ladies, meet my latest pair of sexy beasts!" (for this is what I call my shoes - don't ask why, it just is...).  I, of course, say this just as the principal comes out of his office with his face flushed.  I say, "sorry you had to hear that crazy girl talk."  He says, "No, I'm the one who is sorry, because I hate to tell you this but the Superintendent is sitting in my office!"  I am now mortified because our Districts Superintendent is very proper and straight-laced so I take the mature way out - I turn and run away as fast as my Sexy Beasts would carry me! (which was not very fast...)
Later in the day I see a friend who says, "I hear you impressed the Superintendent today with your shoes!"  OMG now I look around and I'm sure I see other adults in the area pointing and snickering, how many people know about this?  Just then a second teacher walks up and says, "Let me see those 'hooker hoofers!"  I respond with "What are you talking about?"  She says "you know, the shoes you showed the Superintendent this morning and told him they were your 'hooker hoofers!"  The first friend says, "I thought you called them your 'bitchy boots!'  "Now hold on one minute" I sputter, "First I didn't show the Super my shoes at all, I ran away and I called them Sexy Beasts, not Hooker Hoofers or Bitchy Boots - I mean, they are sandals for crying out loud!" The first friend says, "Well that's what I heard from the Principal!" and the second friend, "I heard my story from the custodian"  Just then a third friend walks up and says, "you talkin' about those 'stripper stilettos'?  I heard about it from someone in the math department!"
Moral of the story?  Look before you speak!!!